The corpse was riddled with stab wounds. Beside the body lay a bloody knife, and painted on the wall, a message: I, A MURDERER, HAVE COMMITTED THIS MURDER WITH A KNIFE. Below the message were the name and address of the killer, along with his tax returns, several photographs, and details on how to follow him on social media.
The detective frowned. This would be a tough case to crack. He turned to his partner. “How,” he said, “can we be sure it’s not the Sun?”
Sometimes I feel like climate scientists live in an alternate-universe Law and Order, where the detectives are less attractive and every episode begins with an argument over whether objective reality exists. Imagine how boring crime dramas would be if the police were forced to spend the first 45 minutes explaining that yes, they are aware that people die of natural causes all the time.
In reality, the facts are pretty clear: our world is changing, and there are fingerprints all over the scene. We’ve collected plenty of evidence. And we know, beyond any reasonable doubt, who did this.
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